One of the most common misconceptions about habits, especially for people with ADHD, is the belief that better discipline will solve the problem.
In reality, discipline-based approaches often lead to frustration, burnout, and eventually abandoning the habit altogether. What creates consistency is not forcing yourself to work harder, but building systems that align with how your brain already operates.
A Real-Life Example
Recently, I worked with a client who was excellent at responding to text messages and email, yet consistently missed important messages on WhatsApp. This was not because she didn’t care or lacked responsibility. It was simply because WhatsApp was not part of her established daily workflow, so it regularly fell outside her attention.
Instead of encouraging her to “check it more often,” we stepped back and asked a more effective question: how does she already communicate successfully, and how can we design the habit around that existing behavior?
That shift made all the difference. Use this Overcoming Discouragement worksheet to help you overcome debilitating thoughts.
The Goal Was Consistency, Not the Tool
The real goal was never to become better at using WhatsApp. The goal was to communicate consistently without adding unnecessary stress.
Once we stopped trying to change her natural tendencies and focused on working with them, the solution became straightforward. We connected WhatsApp prompts to tools she already used every day, such as email, calendar alerts, and text reminders. By integrating the habit into systems she already trusted, the behavior happened naturally without relying on willpower or guilt.
This same approach shows up across my ADHD-focused coaching, whether we are working on communication, time management, follow-through, or financial confidence.
Five ADHD-Friendly Ways to Build Habits That Actually Stick
These principles are the foundation of how I help clients build habits that last.
1. Attach New Habits to Existing Routines
Starting a habit from scratch requires a level of mental effort that is especially challenging for ADHD brains. Instead of creating something entirely new, it is far more effective to connect the habit to an existing routine. If you already check your email every morning, that moment becomes the anchor for the new behavior.
Examples include checking WhatsApp immediately after reviewing email, reviewing finances right after sending invoices, or planning the upcoming week immediately following your final meeting on Friday. When habits are layered onto routines that already exist, they are much more likely to stick.
2. Design for How You Function, Not How You Think You Should
There is no single “right” way to build habits, particularly for people with ADHD. Some individuals respond best to visual systems, while others need reminders, conversations, or simple checklists. Some thrive with structure, while others feel overwhelmed by it.
The key is to design habits that match how you actually operate. If a system has not worked for you in the past, that does not mean you failed. It means the system was not designed with your brain in mind.
3. Reduce Friction Wherever Possible
If a habit feels complicated, time-consuming, or mentally heavy, it is unlikely to last. ADHD brains are especially sensitive to friction, which is why reminders, automation, templates, and prompts are essential tools rather than shortcuts.
The easier the action feels, the more likely it is to happen. When the effort required is minimal, follow-through becomes a natural response instead of a constant internal negotiation.
4. Use External Structure to Build Internal Confidence
Many ADHD clients struggle not because they lack ability, but because certain tasks trigger discomfort or avoidance. Financial conversations are a common example.
Instead of expecting confidence to appear through exposure alone, we build structure around the process. This might include regular check-ins, reviewing numbers together, or talking through decisions in real time. Over time, repetition and support reduce anxiety and increase clarity, allowing confidence to develop gradually.
External structure acts as a bridge until the habit feels manageable internally.
5. Focus on Consistency Over Perfection
Perfectionism and all-or-nothing thinking often make habit-building harder for people with ADHD. Progress happens through consistent, imperfect action rather than waiting for the ideal moment.
Checking a communication tool once a day is more effective than avoiding it entirely. Reviewing finances weekly is far better than postponing it for months. Small, repeatable actions create momentum, and momentum builds confidence.
ADHD Coaching Is About Designing Around Real Life
ADHD coaching is not about forcing change or fitting into rigid productivity frameworks. It is about identifying what already works, letting go of what clearly does not, and building systems that support real life instead of idealized expectations.
This is how habits begin to stick, confidence builds over time, and sustainable progress actually happens.
If you have been struggling with a habit that never seems to stick, the issue may not be you. It may simply be time to design a system that works with your brain.
🌟 Reviews for Maria Medina's Business Coaching
Maria as my coach feels like adding an executive leader to my team. Her experience from startup to growth to exit gives her a perspective I truly value. She’s my strategist and thought partner in leadership, communication, and marketing, while also helping me grow personally in time management, limiting beliefs, and relationship building. On top of that, she’s fun to work with! I highly recommend Maria to any professional or leader looking for guidance and support.
We have been working with The Coaching Network (Maria) for about 6 months now. Maria has helped us tremendously with navigating business networking groups. Not just with selecting the one best for us, but trained us on how to participate in them. She’s even sent some referrals our way. Her knowledge with our industry is a huge plus with daily operations as we continue to learn and grow. Our sales have increased beyond the original target we set after the first few sessions. We will continue using those strategies going into next year focusing on continued growth. Thanks, Maria!
I have worked with Maria consistently for over six months. She proved to be highly effective in helping me analyze my existing marketing opportunities and create new ones. By providing an impartial point of view, she assists me in selecting the best course of action for each specific marketing strategy to maximize my ROI and shorten the turnaround cycles. Thank you, Maria!
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